The hilarious things the children I teach have said.

Posts tagged ‘outofthemouthsofbabes’

Special water

A girl I teach and her older sister were telling me how strong their Dad is. He is so strong, he can carry their Mum up the stairs! When the two girls told me this, the look on my face obviously prompted clarification from them. I didn’t expect to hear,

“Yeah, when Mummy drinks too much special water, she can’t walk up the stairs, so Daddy carries Mummy up stairs.”

 I’d really like a glass of this ‘special water’, or maybe two!

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Luck o’ the Irish

We have been doing lots of work this week, and some of it included learning about St Patrick. I stumbled across a Youtube video of a Leprechaun counting. In the video, he Leprechaun says he is ‘1001’ years old. A little girl I teach, who is very small with large, blue, marbled eyes asks with wonder, 

“Miss Rainbow, do Leprechauns live forever?”

It was like she was asking if Santa is real (of course he is!). I said, ‘Yes sweetheart, they do live forever.’ 

We made pots of gold and rainbows (find them on my Pinterest board for Religious Celebrations). The same little girl told everyone to, 

“Make sure you put plenty of glitter on the pots of gold to keep them living forever.”

With any luck, she’s kept the magic going.

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Aside

A blow out lunch…

While dealing with a few issues between my stomach and gluten, I opted for a ‘gluten free’ quiche from a cafe near work. It was delicious! Such an easy lunch, with a great salad on the side.

Following lunch, a girl in my class walked up to me and said,

‘Miss Rainbow, suddenly… Well, it looks like there’s a baby in your belly. Maybe you’ll have your baby at the same time as my Mummy has my little brother or sister.’

I’ve not gone back to that cafe for their ‘gluten free’ quiche and salad… images-3

Wait, have I got that right?

While talking about the Creation Story and Adam and Eve, the girls in my class were extremely upset to find out that Adam was created first. The boys I taught, obviously felt quite proud and very happy with God’s choice to make ‘man’ first. The girls were done with religion and God. They didn’t want to hear it. One girl told me to close the bible because boys would probably always get everything first in the rest of the story (I had taught her something, looking for a pattern, inferential comprehension). 

I was trying to meet one of my qualities that I listed in the ‘personal qualities’ section on my resume, and think quickly on my feet. Before I could say anything, a girl said ‘Yeah, well the boy might have come first, but the girl gets to carry the babies. We needed the man to come first so he could give us the sperms!’ 

Again, trying to think quickly on my feet, and come up with something to come out of my mouth, and the girl looked at me and said, ‘Wait, have I got that right?’ I just said, ‘Yes, sweetheart.’ Then it was on to maths, much less controversial.

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meandmyThermie

just an ordinary mum, who aside from a good cappuccino, loves cooking all things healthily and gluten free in her Thermomix