The hilarious things the children I teach have said.

Posts tagged ‘kids’

You’re too pretty…

In Australia, we have a van, called ‘Life Education’. It promotes healthy living and educates all children (younger children more subtly) about drug use and its dangers. The younger children engage with a giraffe named Harold. The van is AWESOME and I loved visiting when I was a kid.

The visit can bring up feelings of worry and concern as it discusses smoking and how bad it is for you. Children who have parents who smoke usually want to talk about this after the visit.

A child asked me,

“Have you ever smoked, Miss Rainbow?”

Before I could tell them that no, never have I smoked a cigarette, I was told, 

“No, you’re too pretty to smoke.”

And that was that! 

Shake ya tail feather…

While at our sports carnival on Friday, parents and siblings were cheering on their children in the relay races. One sibling, cheered for their brother in a rather, interesting way…

“Go, Jack, shake ya tail feather!”

On a loud, hot, busy day in an open, large space outside, a roar of laughter erupted!

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The clip

Today, while discussing  siblings and the sizes of families, one child announced, 

“Well my Mother has five children and she delivered them all naturally. Dad had enough once she had me, so she’s got the clip in her belly to stop the babies getting in!”

Good to know, child. Good to know. 

Strange questions

Sometimes, kids come out with really strange questions. What makes them strange, is that the question itself is unusual, but the child asking it will often wait a long time in a line full of other children about to ask strange questions, or have their hand up, go red in the face and look like they are about to burst at the seams. You quickly ask them what they would like to say, only to be asked, 

“Miss Rainbow, do you ever feel like you’re not real?”

I actually didn’t have an answer. 

Wouldn’t be without them, would you?

Today, we talked about making a ‘Wanted’ poster for the Big Bad Wolf in Little Red Riding Hood. We talked about what sort of information we could put on the poster. One child suggested that we should tell people what to do if they see the Big Bad Wolf. I suggested that perhaps a phone number would be important. One child shot her hand in the air, and exclaimed, 

“RACQ, Mum said she wouldn’t be without them!”

To understand, if you are not in Australia, watch this link https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FRdZBYbom-Q. RACQ basically provides roadside assistance, changes tyres and gives you new batteries if you are in a spot of bother. About ten years ago they had a jingle (which is now their slogan) which sung, ‘Wouldn’t be without them, would you?’ 

This child has been taught well. 

If I had a Fairy Godmother…

We are doing lots of work on fairy tales in my class at the moment. This week, we read Cinderella. We talked about what we would do if we met had a Fairy Godmother. I asked one girl what she would do if she had a Fairy Godmother. She said,

“I would wish for her to wave her wand, and make you a prince charming and lots of babies to have with him. You won’t meet a prince charming without my wish, Miss Rainbow!”

Gee, thanks, kid. 

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The King of Pop

Sometimes, kids ask you really random questions and you have no idea where it all comes from. 

Today I was asked, 

“Miss Rainbow, when did you meet Michael Jackson?”

Never have, never said I have. Don’t even think I’ve said his name in the classroom… 

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meandmyThermie

just an ordinary mum, who aside from a good cappuccino, loves cooking all things healthily and gluten free in her Thermomix