The hilarious things the children I teach have said.

Posts tagged ‘classroom’

I didn’t get a turn!

A child in my class had the sulks today. After I asked what was wrong, I was told, rather explosively,

“I didn’t get a turn on the interrupting whiteboard!”

Umm, righteo, child!


The best ‘Knock, Knock’ Joke you’ve ever heard

For ‘Show and Tell’, a boy got up with what he claimed to be the best ‘Knock, Knock’ joke we’ve ever heard.

Now, I should point out that, developmentally, children do try to engage with humour at all ages, but to successfully tell a joke in its proper form happens at about age ten. I’m teaching six and seven year olds. Sure makes for an interesting time! 

Usually, our ‘Show and Tell’ time consists of a child trying to tell a joke, me understanding the odd one, laughing at the odd one and the rest of the class laughing if I laugh. If I have a small chuckle, they had a small chuckle. If I didn’t laugh much, they didn’t laugh at all. Occasionally, the children sat there and said, ‘I don’t get it.’

Boy: “Knock, knock!”

Class: “Who’s there?”

Boy: “Lettuce!”

Class: “Lettuce, who?”

Boy: “Tomato!”

Class: “Tomato, who?”

Boy: “Cucumber!”

Class: “Cucumber, who?”

Girl in audience: “Aren’t you just listing ingredients for salad?”

Boy: “I did it wrong…”

Definitely the best ‘Knock, Knock’ joke I’ve heard from a child!

Circle time

Each morning, before we start our busy routine, I sit with my class in a circle. We rate ourselves on a one to five scale. If you rate yourself as a one, you re doing fine and don’t have a worry in the world. If you are a two or three, you are doing okay, perhaps a little tired or one or two things on your mind. If you are a four or five, you need to talk about why you want to cry.

I got this idea from this video .

In the mornings, the children share lots of lovely reasons why they are a ‘one’ (happy). One my favourites has been,

“Miss Rainbow, I’m a one because I got new shoelaces and that makes me really happy and glad.”

Whatever floats your boat!

Luck o’ the Irish

We have been doing lots of work this week, and some of it included learning about St Patrick. I stumbled across a Youtube video of a Leprechaun counting. In the video, he Leprechaun says he is ‘1001’ years old. A little girl I teach, who is very small with large, blue, marbled eyes asks with wonder, 

“Miss Rainbow, do Leprechauns live forever?”

It was like she was asking if Santa is real (of course he is!). I said, ‘Yes sweetheart, they do live forever.’ 

We made pots of gold and rainbows (find them on my Pinterest board for Religious Celebrations). The same little girl told everyone to, 

“Make sure you put plenty of glitter on the pots of gold to keep them living forever.”

With any luck, she’s kept the magic going.



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Rosie Waterland

Rosie Waterland is a writer based in Sydney. She finds her own jokes particularly hilarious.

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